The last few weeks have been busy, and its only going to escalate from here. This upcoming week is my last week of classes for the quarter, but I have two finals and four papers due this week (thank goodness two of the papers are short!). Frankly, I'm not looking forward to the stress. I cannot stand being stressed out. There are a few things that I'm stressing over currently.
First, there's the issue with my co-op. The place where I worked during the Winter quarter, I won't be returning to during the Summer. No hard feelings, but it made me a upset when my former boss claimed that I had said turned down the postion for the summer. In reality, I told him that I would contact him asap about coming back. So, basically, he offered the position to the current co-op that took my spot, and I'm left without a co-op position. I did have a meeting with an editor of a local magazine that I met during an entrepreneurship workshop on campus on Wednesday. The problem is that he's offering an unpaid, part-time internship position in advertising/sales at his magazine; co-op positions are paid positions. There may be a chance that I can earn something for my time spent working there part-time: a car. Sounds very eccentric and risky, but I've had time since then to think about it, and discuss this with my mother. My Mom is always available to discuss hard decisions with me such as this one; bless her <3 I truly love her for that! I would just be glad that I can find some type of experience, unpaid or not, I'm not to crazy about the car idea though. I never want people to see me as a charity case, because I am so far from that. I would rather struggle and save to get a car on my own means, than to have someone to purchase a vehicle for me. I actually do have some money saved up, pretty much for a buggy, a hooptie, or whatever your word of choice is for a junker. Hey, I'm not too stuck on the appearance of the first car that I do purchase, but at long as it has the basics, and can get me to where I have to go, that will be suitable. In ther next few weeks, I am hoping to negotiate with the magazine editor about his offer.
Secondly, although this is so far from the other issues in my life, that it seems almost insignificant. As I was leaving campus yesterday from a Bearcast meeting, a friend and I was walking to the nearest bus stop and chatting all the way there pretty much. Lo and behold, I walked past my ex's car, just parked oh so nicely on the street. Now that I'm discussing it here, it seems lame that I even mention it, because a few weeks prior this, I saw it parked in the same spot, oddly. Thinking nothing of it, or almost nothing, I continued my conversation with my buddy, who's a guy (forgot to mention). A minute later, we walked past McDonald's, and I'm 85% sure that the ex was sitting in there looking right back at me. I looked at him, and continued my conversation with my friend. All I could think then is redemption! That's definately my closure on that chapter in my life. Yes, granted its normal to run into an ex, I'm not used to that, since he was my first real relationship (the 'out of sight, out of mind' theory does not work). I'm a late bloomer in that aspect. But I read Huny's latest entry before writing my own; she talked about how you realize after the relationship is over, how you changed yourself, or put on your public face to mask all your personal flaws. It's like you put your heart on the line for someone to just crush it. I'm not giving up hope though; I'm aware that there is someone out here in the world that would acept me for me, along with all my flaws. I'm destined to find my equal someday. But for the time being, I have the summer to focus on.